Life Transitions - The Uncharted Territory of Becoming
BY JACKIE LEON
Transitions are seldom fun. Often, they come as disruptive, cataclysmic situations where we're called to take a good look at ourselves. Who we are. What we are. What now?
The lifequake, the actual change, can be voluntary or involuntary. Getting laid off, divorce, death of a loved one (involuntary). Choosing to leave a job, ending a relationship, relocating (voluntary). But here's what people don't understand: the transition period that follows a change is always psychological. It's the internal process of adapting, questioning your identity, exploring new possibilities, and gradually building a new sense of self.
The change is situational. The transition is personal. And deciding to consciously engage with the transition period is always voluntary. You have to flip the switch and go through the motion and emotions. This is where most people get stuck, waiting for permission or the "right" moment to begin, or letting go...
Transitions are scary, unpredictable, chaotic, incomprehensible, and take longer than you think. Bruce Feiler suggests we go through 3 to 5 life transitions. I say we go through more than that. The average length is 5 years, so imagine how many years you spend in transition. Better make the most of it!
Here's what the experts won't tell you: transitions aren't linear. There's no step-by-step manual, no predictable timeline. One day you feel like you're making progress, the next you're back at square one. But this isn't failure, it's the creative process of becoming. Like an artist working with clay, you shape, reshape, and sometimes start over entirely.
With experience, I can tell you that the transition phase is a healer. It can feel like a transforming process that helps your growth and gives you a chance to start over. It's a place where creativity thrives, where the soil is fertile and where possibilities grow. And believe me, this is enough to find yourself, give shape to your future, and create new meaning in your life.
Everyone has their own style of coping with endings, coping with messy middles and new beginnings. Everyone is different. It's about the journey of transformation. Everyone goes through this at their own pace, in their own way. Your transition doesn't have to look like anyone else's.
Questions to sit with:
What would you attempt if you knew this transition was actually preparing you for something extraordinary?
If this uncertain phase is fertile ground for creativity, what wants to grow in your life right now?
What if the chaos you're experiencing isn't something to fix, but something to trust?
You don't have to do it alone. Coaches are there to help you navigate big life transitions. But more importantly, you have everything within you to not just survive this transition, but to use it as the raw material for creating a life that's authentically yours.
The script is yours to write. The possibilities are infinite. The becoming has already begun.